Why Not?
by CaptainBellarkeSwan
Summary: Out of the corner of her eye, she saw her brace peeking from under the pile of clothes. Before she could ponder on it, she felt her body grew tensed. "Why not?" The question echoed in her mind. It seemed so simple, yet she could not bring herself to answer his question.


**I didn't realize how perfect Ice Mechanic would be until the last episode. I vaguely remember agreeing to Ice Mechanic a while back before season 4 came out, but I've never been actively looking for them. (I've always been Bellarke from the start) Anyway I realized how badass they would be as a couple. Oh, and imagine the hotness? These two are so beautiful physically and as people as well. So here is a fic that started as a drabble and turned into a full-blown fic. I hope you enjoy! It's my first Ice Mechanic fic after all.**

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Raven watched the scene unfold in front of her. Somehow a part of her had expected Clarke to do that, to inject the Nightblood into herself. Yet that didn't mean she wasn't surprised when Clarke actually did it. Her chest tightened at the thought of what could possibly happen to her friend, but she respected her choice. She would have probably done the same thing if she was in her shoes.

Abby was enraged, smashing the radiation chamber into pieces. She understood that Abby was devastated, but did she really have to go that far? The radiation chamber was the only way they could check their theories on how to survive, and now it was left in pieces, all shattered across the white tiles of Becca's lab.

It had been almost an hour since the incident happened, yet everyone was still as shocked as they were moments ago. Luna had left immediately. Abby and Clarke huddled on the floor as they hugged each other fiercely. Clarke was whispering into her mother's ears, while Abby's tears rolled down her cheeks. Jackson and Miller were seated on the remaining chairs, face filled with anxiety and fear. Murphy and Emori was nowhere to be found, probably they went back to the house to celebrate whatnot. And she was stuck with the Ice King still looking at the mother and daughter with an unreadable expression on his face.

Not knowing what to do, she turned around to climb the stairs. She made her way to the doors where the cold night wind welcomed her. She would have said that it was fresh except it really wasn't.

There was a sense of peace outside that seemed oblivious to the chaos and terror inside the mansion, and Raven released the breath she was holding. Her body seemed to relax with the blowing wind as she sat on the tall green grass. She could see the distant shore just before the vast sea. The angry sky loomed over them with thick clouds.

It was terrifying to know how different and how beautiful the Ground looked like when she first landed on Earth. But there was something in the way the angry tones of the Ground that made it look beautiful in its own way.

The crunch of grass under heavy boots brought her back to reality.

She did not expect to see the Ice King walking towards her. Wanting to be alone, she gave him a glare, but that didn't seem to faze him because he did not stop until he stood beside her.

That didn't mean she was going to speak to him though. Maybe she was a bit surprised that he had stayed silent as well as they watched the swaying trees, the rolling clouds, the glistening sea in the distance. Then he spoke, his deep voice felt strangely soothing.

"So?"

She turned her head to look at him."So what?"

He was still looking far ahead and Raven did not miss the way his jaw tightened before he looked at her. "What are we going to do?"

"Aren't you supposed to ask Clarke?" she said without any bitterness of her friend. This was their call. After all, they destroyed the chamber and they thought of the Nightblood marrow solution just as the people of Mt. Weather did. She made it clear that she was against it from the very beginning.

Roan shook his head. His lips curving into an amused smirk that surprised her. It was bit unnerving to see such a reaction coming from the Ice King himself.

"I'm not as heartless as you think I am."

Their exchange of words lapsed into silence. Raven wasn't sure if he wasn't really as interested in knowing the answer to his question or if he was only trying to be respectful of her own silence.

She tried to think that the reason was the former.

Somehow something had changed between them after that brief encounter. Or it had been only her. She tried to act as normal as possible but within her, a whirlwind of emotions crashed through her heart that it did not make sense.

Sometimes she would feel angry and would just want to lash out and to smash everything to bits and pieces. And she just wanted to hit someone. Sometimes she felt sad and lonely in the big lab surrounded by the beeping machines that eerily reminded her of Mt. Weather. And she just wanted someone to hold her, nice and warm. Sometimes she felt like curling up into a ball and just cry her heart out. And she just wanted a someone to thumb her tears away.

Her rationality told her it was only because of the amount of stress she had been through. All of them had been through. And that the Ice King had nothing to do it with all of it.

Not one bit.

So Raven did what she thought was best for her. She tried to ignore him and his annoyingly loud presence. It was really hard not to notice someone in the white laboratory. They all stood out like sore thumbs with their dark heavy clothing.

But it was particularly hard to ignore him. There were times when she was working on something, and Raven would immediately notice that he had entered the room just by the sound of his boots squeaking across the tiled floor.

He would sit down anywhere he wanted to. Sometimes he would sit at the elevated floor. Sometimes it was on one of the spare chairs. She wouldn't tell him that she actually saw him spinning around on the chair with a twinkle in his eyes when he thought she was not looking.

On rare occasions, he would stand close to her, beside her in front of the computer. That was the hardest for Raven because she could almost feel his skin brushing against hers. She had to hold back with all her strength before she did something stupid.

Altogther, it was hard. Even when he was almost at the other end of the room, it was as if she could still feel him standing right beside. She could feel his eyes searing onto her back as she moved along the computer table in silence. Though she was grateful that he never tried to start a conversation between those times. Even when she could feel that he actually wanted to.

So she shouldn't be really surprised that a time would come when they would have to talk to each other. It was that one time when Clarke decided that it was time for her to rest.

"Raven, you should go."

Irritation flickered inside her. "No."

Clarke's face grew frustrated as she laid a hand on Raven's shoulder. "Please, Raven. You've been here for days. You have to rest."

The irritation inside her flared into anger, clenching her hands into fists as she tried to control her emotions. "No, Clarke! We don't have time anymore now that the radiation chamber is broken! We have to find a way now more than ever!"

She noticed something flashed in her friend's eyes before it was replaced by a hopeful look that Raven did not understand.

"I know, Raven, I know. I'll stay here with Jackson. We're not gonna let go..."

"Clarke, we have to! If not, then all we've fought have been all for nothing!"

Clarke gripped her shoulders tight as she looked at her straight in the eye, a look of worry passing over her face. "Look, Raven, all I want is for you to rest for a while. It will do you some good. I promise you, it will."

"I'll go with her." A gruff voice joined in from behind her.

Of course, she knew who it was. Damn him!

Clarke gave Roan a small nod, but Raven was quick to refuse. "I don't need your help."

"Raven, Roan will keep you safe. We don't know if there are other people out there, and we also don't know if they're friendly or not because that last one definitely wasn't as friendly."

She knew that it was a losing battle from the start, but Raven had to try anyway. So that was why she found herself walking silently through the woods, trying to constantly outpace the Ice King. Perhaps he was he one adjusting for her, but she did not mind. She just did not want to talk to him for now.

As soon as they arrived on the house, she quickly made her way to the stairs without heeding another word to the king. She found the shower room and stripped off her dirty clothes. Turning the water knob to hot, she stepped under the steaming water.

A hiss left her lips as she closed her eyes shut. As she tried to forget the way his calculating eyes had followed every move she made. As she tried to forget the way he had felt under her when she had made a misstep and almost slipped, the way his large warm hands had almost covered the span of her waist, the way his breathing hitched when they had stayed still for a second too long.

That had been one of the longest trips of her life, and she had traveled from camp to Polis and back a couple of times. It was only a couple of minutes, but it had felt like hours with the burning feel of his stare on her back. Raven did not believe in fate, but it was the only thing that she could blame because she could definitely walk just as she had before her leg got hit. Fate had plans for her. For them.

She turned the water cold, her angry red skin almost hissing under the sudden change of temperature. The iciness pulled everything down and her body grew numb, covering every reaction and every mark he had managed to leave on her.

How stupid of her to think of things like fate? Fate wouldn't do anything to save the world. It didn't do anything to save her from the heartbreaks and suffering.

She stepped out of the shower room with a new sense of calmness and resolve that the Ice King was not going to get under her skin. She wasn't going to allow him to bury himself deep within her.

It was when she took out a set of fresh clothing somewhere in the cabinets that the scent of something delicious hit her nose. She knew that if she went down, she'd have to talk to him, but the call of food was too much to refuse. In the end, she went down.

A plate of steaming food sat on the table. And there he was standing by the stove, shirtless and his hair wet as water dripped from his hair down his muscled back in a manner that definitely did not make her throat dry. (It really did.)

She wasn't going to deny that the man had a nice figure with ripping muscles and tanned skin. But it really wasn't fair that he stood there displaying his body like it was nothing out of the ordinary.

Then he turned around. This time, though, it wasn't his body that caught her attention. It was the look he was giving her. There was something in his eyes that somehow drew her in. There was something in his eyes that pulled her towards him, that made her want to wrap her arms around him, that made her want to press her lips onto those soft-looking lips.

How could she ever think she could resist the man when he looked so goddamn delicious?

A moan left his lips as he pulled her close to him, every inch of her body pressed against his in a delicious way that made her dizzy with want. With the food long forgotten, he cupped her ass and lifted her to wrap her legs around his waist. He brought her to the bedroom and placed her on the bed. There was a moment of silence as they both frantically removed every piece of their clothing. And when he finally pressed his skin against hers, a sigh left her lips as warmth filled her chest.

They had taken everything that they could from each other. It felt like a game of push and pull as they moved against each other, hard muscled planes on soft silky skin. Their breaths mingled like the tendrils of their hair sticking on their forehead with sweat. They rode out waves of pleasure over and over again until they collapse in a tangle of limbs.

Something sparked between them after that night. Suddenly she found herself pressed against the wall countless, just as he was pinned on the floor as she rode him to oblivion. Suddenly he would pull her away from everyone's eyes and kiss her as if there was no tomorrow (pun not intended). He would whisper filthy things in her ears and for a moment, she'd find herself thinking of nothing but him and what he made her feel.

Suddenly he was everywhere. He was there in the same room as she was when she was trying to work on new solutions. He was there in her mind even when she tried to work. And unknowingly, he had made himself a place inside her heart.

She didn't even realize it until one night. That one night when they found the house to themselves once more. Most nights it was fast and rough. He would fill her up and bring her higher and higher until her mind soared high above the clouds and she would fall back down hard, white hot fireworks popped everywhere inside her.

But tonight was different.

She felt it in the way he had kissed her as if she was a fragile thing. He kissed her so softly and so tenderly as if...

Not wanting to finish that statement, she responded with a sharp tug of his hair. He growled and he kissed her back hard and heavy in the way that she had grown accustomed to. Yet he dragged her lips down her body, his mouth whispering words of nothing but praise of her, of her body, of her mind. His fingers trailed across her skin, almost like a hint of a caress.

Her chest tightened as her heart pounded in a way that was all too familiar. She didn't want to think about it, but it was hard when he was stroking her hot core with such care, it was hard when he was leaning his forehead on hers and looking just as wrecked when she had done nothing to him. Then he opened his eyes, blown so wide it almost swallowed his irises.

There was something in his eyes heart made her heart churn as if someone was gripping her heart so tight it was going to burst. Her eyes stung with tears, her lips trembled with fear of something she had tried to avoid. She was afraid of how easy she had slipped right back into this dance that it was almost as if her heart hadn't had enough.

He suddenly slowed down, a look of worry on his face. "What's wrong?"

She shook her head, afraid of how broken her voice might sound.

"We can stop..."

She felt his hand on her cheek. Had she been crying?

"No!" she breathed out before crashing her lips on his.

They both finished together in each other's arms, eyes searing into each other, foreheads touching in a tender way. Raven didn't even realized that they had moved until she felt his fingers drawing circles on her hip, and she found herself with her head resting on his shoulder and his arms secure around her waist.

Then everything crashed down. Suddenly she felt too warm with his heat radiating off in waves. She felt suffocated by his embrace. The soothing circles he drew on her skin became a reminder of what she had promised herself with each growing second.

She pushed his arms away, not meeting his gaze as she threw the covers back. Tears started to roll down her cheeks as she sobbed silently, pushing herself to sit up. She could feel his eyes on the back of her head and that drove her away more until she sat on the edge of the bed. The contrast of the cool tiled floor made her stop.

Should she do it? Out of the corner of her eye, she saw her brace peeking from under the pile of clothes. Before she could ponder on it, she felt her body grew tensed.

"Why not?"

The question echoed in her mind.

It seemed so simple.

 _Because he left me and cheated on me. He was all that I had just as I was everything that he had. Yet he threw me away like nothing._

 _Because he was too perfect. He helped me all the time. He was always here right by my side, and I felt so weak even though I knew that he was doing it because he cared for me._

 _Because I realized that it was all me. That Raven Reyes was so broken and she did not deserve any love. She didn't need any love._

In her mind, she found herself standing in the darkness, slowly closing in on her. The space around her suffocated her with the loud beep of silence. She screamed with all her strength as she felt her heart crack open and everything fell off, bit by bit. Tears gushed down, covering her cheeks and face. She hugged her knees close to her chest, attempting to feel something in this dark cold world.

Her heart pounded in her chest as her mind raced with a torrent of emotions. The first sound of her sobs made her realize that she was really crying and not just a product of her imagination. She tried to stop the tears from escaping her eyes, but her chest grew tighter and tighter in each second. In the end, she let go and tears rolled down her cheeks, sobs and whimpers escaped her lips.

God, she must look so pathetic.

Something brushed against her back. His hand felt warm when he placed a hand on her shoulder. His fingers brushed lightly across her skin as he moved his hand down her arm and back up, traveling over her shoulder, down her back until it found her waist.

She stubbornly wiped the tears off her swollen eyes, but she did not dare face him. Not now. Not when she was not like herself. Still, the feel of his fingers sent shivers down her spine. The bed dipped and she felt him shift from behind until he sat beside her. She tilted her head so that he hair hid her face from him as she felt his eyes on her.

His hand brushed across her back onto her other shoulder. He gripped her other arm and pushed her lightly towards him. With hands on both arms, he laid her on her side until her head rested on his lap.

Something inside her burst out in shivers as his fingers traveled up and down her arm, drawing random patterns on her skin. She felt warm as he sat there silently letting her use his lap as her pillow while she cried her heart out. There was something in the way he did it that made her wonder what he saw in her. She didn't know how long she had cried. It had felt like hours, and she thought it was never going to stop. But there was something in feeling and knowing that he was beside her that made her calm down, her face sticky with snot and tears, her eyes and nose swollen.

He hadn't stopped giving her space at the same time letting her know that he was right there by her. That familiar feeling flared inside her and if she was being honest, it was really inevitable. Somehow she knew that she wouldn't be able to keep it in. That if she didn't act now, the time might never come.

With her newfound strength, she tilted her to look at him and found him looking back at her softly. A beat passed between them as they locked gazes. Those cold sharp eyes now looked at her with a certain softness and warmth. Those sneering lips now gave her a small smile that made him look younger. Those calloused hands that many feared now drew love and strength on her skin.

Slowly, she pulled herself up, balancing on her good leg as she stood up wobbly. His hand immediately shot out to steady her. She twisted her body and rested her knee beside his thigh. A noise of surprise left his lips as she threw her injured leg over his legs, sitting back on his lap to relieve her injured leg.

She looked at him in the eye and found that she wasn't afraid anymore. Not when he was looking at her in awe. She rested her forehead on his and a moment of peace fell over them as he wrapped his strong arms around her waist. Something inside her clicked and everything felt so right.

The way his lips felt on her when she kissed him, nipping softly at his lips. The way he breathed out her name and the way she had responded with his. The way they made love into the night until they collapsed on the bed so wrapped up in each other.

The next thing Raven knew the sunlight was filtering out of the curtains. She shifted a bit only to feel his arm draped over her waist as he hugged her from behind. She was both surprised and contented at the calmness that resided within her.

It wasn't long before he started to stir. She had already turned to face him so that she could watch his beautiful face, a warm feeling blooming inside her chest at the thought of how he had allowed her to see a vulnerable side of him. His eyes opened sleepily before a small smile crept to his lips.

She mirrored his smile with one of her own.

"Good morning." she whispered.

"Good morning." he replied before he leaned forward and captured her lips in a kiss that made her toes curl.

In the end, she was right. It was inevitable. This was something different. It wasn't like Finn or Wick. It was so much different and somehow instead of running she realized that she should face it. With him.

Because why not?

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 **I hope the ending didn't happen too quickly (though I had a feeling that it is). I have exams and here I am making fanfics. I both hate it and love it.**

 **Leave a comment or two, will you? :)**


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